Imagine living without needing to pay rent, mortgage
(modified form of rent) or other kind of indebtedness or servitude. The Earth
is our source-parent, who will provide. The earth is so bountiful, so rich,
ripe and ready to give of the spectacular, diversified bounty. Imagine that!
All of Earth as a NO RENT district.
This is my turtle’s song, carrying the home, protected place
of familiar comfort, everywhere it goes.
In March of 2015 when it became apparent that Gma KoKo could sleep in her van, she got a twin bed mattress from Bibles for
A little background that brings us to this place.
Sometime in early 2014, over a year before, a quickening began
to well up within Gma KoKo and ideas started pouring in. Among them was the
idea-knowing that She is magnificent. Imagine that? You, who are reading this,
are also amazingly magnificent. The shear fact, the knowing, that ‘I’ exist is
enough. We don’t have to say. “I believe I may exist” or “Won’t know for sure
until science proves it.” What we feel/know deep in our hearts does not need
‘proof’. Powered by a belief in her own more authentic self came a longing to
live into that, finding time and energy to express more creative aspects. By
opening to that, she moved into the stream of the flow, transition - caterpillar
to butterfly. In that way Turtle Van offers the cocoon to allow the majik of
morph. Metamorphosis, Turtle Sings, walking slow on land, dreams of swimming in
the sea.
Our Deepest Fear —Marianne Williamson
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other
people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is
within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give
other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.”
In the past Gma KoKo’s creative self cried and begged to be
more active, but the fear of being small held her in check. THE BIGGER EXCUSE went like this. Have to work for a living, no time for fun and games. The other
reality was that after working for a living there was damn little energy (life
juice), left for anything, especially trivialities like artistic/creative
aspirations.
Literally, as we rang in the new year of 2014, she started
feeling ‘something more’, and it felt great along with being more than a little
awkward. It was hard to talk about, so she
mostly kept it to herself. In retrospect, she was becoming more sensitive. Her
heart was opening and the intensity of the emotional information was overpowering.
Her previous way of being had involved more logic than emotion. This ‘awakening
of grace’ is a longer story for later.
What’s important here is that she made a conscious decision
to nurture and ‘groove with’ her own ‘bigger’ authentic self. Putting this
purpose first; Conscious Evolution, how’s that for a concept? She was busting
at the seams to have a chance to be creative, to live into the reason for her
birth. What does that even mean? She wasn’t sure, but she knew there was no
turning back and it had something to do with living into the shift. She felt
like a stranger in a strange new land, with shades of feeling like a newborn
baby. Like in the movie Avatar, when the main character, who has a crippled
body, wakes up in a different land and in a different body that can not only
walk but run. Believe this, she didn’t want to go back. It was like drawing the
‘get out of jail free card’ (reference to the game Monopoly). Drawing from
folklore, she felt like a Selkie finding her skin and the way to return to the sea.
Selkie may be defined as a mythical creature that looks like a seal in water
but assumes human form on land. Seal shape-shifters similar to the selkie exist
in the folklore of many cultures.
Painting by Jessica Shirley http://jessicashirley.blogspot.co.uk/2011/03/selkie-girl.html |
Turns out her intuition was sharpening up and providing
direction, her main preoccupation was to allow it. Like a blind person feeling her
way in the dark, it was a bumpy ride. Basically, it was clear that she needed
to let go of all EXTRA material entanglements. It took her most of the year
2014 to sell, give away or trash the large amount of things, including the
‘doom store’. She had collected a lot of stuff for TEOTWAWKI, (the end of the
world as we know it), along with just plain being a hoarder, liking to collect
things. She still had boxes of unsorted things from her parent’s home, they
were hoarders, so she comes by it ‘honestly’.
Ha ha.
Most important was growing her creative self, tending the
garden of what to water and grow and what to let go of. Granting her-self
permission to be creative wasn’t at all like an on/off switch. In retrospect,
parts of it were excruciatingly painful, like deep surgery with a long period
of restorative recuperation. Clearing, cleaning, sanitizing the inner landscape
is not for sissies. None the less, the way forward was made clear inch by inch.
In March of 2015, Gma KoKo found Turtle Van and the $35
mattress, and she moved into her teeny tiny Turtle Van. Rather than looking for
one place to call home, Gma KoKo is longing to ‘gather the tribe’, find the
people who can and will step up to make a difference. Rather than calling any
one scrap of land, home and possessing it, she longs to ‘marry the earth’ to
commune with the essence of the planet of her birth. Turtle song is calling the
earth, ‘love me as I love you’, walk many paths, pass through mountains and
valleys, experience the heartbeat of Grandmother Turtle. In many people’s
mythology the world is said to rest on the back of a turtle. By taking the slow
track at turtle speed we allow our observation of human, animal and plant
relationships to remind us of a time when human life was in balance with the
earth’s offerings and rhythms of seasonal rounds. In some traditions Grandmother
Turtle is said to carry the teaching of truth.
The Legend of Grandmother Turtle
There is a creation story, told by the Native Americans
about how the earth was formed. The earth was covered in water and when the
animals grew tired of flying and swimming, it was the wisest of them,
Grandmother Turtle, who swam to the bottom of the ocean and brought dirt to the
surface, a gift from the creator. As each animal took some dirt and placed it
on Grandmother Turtle’s back, she grew large enough to become the land we rest
on. The story goes that turtles are slow because they carry the weight of the
world on their backs.
Grandmother Turtle by Dorrie Joy
|
Turtle Totem or Spirit Animal
The turtle totem wisdom teaches us about walking our path in
peace and sticking to it with determination and serenity. Slow moving on earth,
yet also incredibly fast and agile in water, those who have the turtle as totem
or spirit animal may be encouraged to take a break in their busy lives and look
around or within themselves for more grounded, long-lasting solutions.
Traditionally, the turtle is symbolic of the way of peace, whether it’s
inviting us to cultivate peace of mind or a peaceful relationship with our
environment.
By Elena Harris, SpiritAnimal.info Editor
In closing, will share a poem Gma KoKo wrote as she understood the calling.
Who is she?
Who is she who would marry the wind?
That woman is my sister for I shall marry the earth.
She who is…running with the wind, running with the wolves,
running on empty.
She who is…tangled in the branches whipped by the wind, left
for dead, left alone.
The wind is a harsh mistress, she is fickle, both male and
female
An element such like the wind can whip up a storm and leave
one in the dust.
Yet all the fury retreats in the lull of the duldrum, when
the wind takes his time,
Moving slowly, purposefully, whispering, be mine, beyond
time.
Most would give wind no notice, but for the woman who has
fallen in love
There is no release from the charms of the motion of air.
Here I am, in love with the earth, my life entwined, my
heart exposed
Here am I, filled with the pain, sensing her heartbeat,
knowing her glory
The earth is a cold hard lover, fixated on the long haul.
An element such like the earth can move mountains and spit
flames
Yet her sincere fecundity and succulent offerings overflow
From her endless bosom, from her sacred heart of secret
knowing.
In this grace of the ages I take refuge and comfort, as
lovers do.
I am not worthy, but I claim to be lover of the earth
I claim to take her to my bed and make endless love with
Her sweet earth-dirt crumbling through my hands
I claim to love her more than my own life,
I claim to love her more than your life.
This love we share, the earth and I, is more real than any
other.
There is more than enough for my love and I on this planet
of love.
In the name of love, in the name of my love for my own
spouse
I stand to protect her from all who would harm her,
Whether done in knowing or done unknowingly,
The harm must stop, the earth has had enough.
The buck stops here
Literally
From hence forward all who harm the earth will suffer and
become less dense.
All who seek to profit by her pain will find her pain on
their own front door.
Those who would lay bare her surface to waste in the grist
mill of profit.
Will find that already their boat is leaky and time has
passed them by.
All who celebrate the earth and move to bless and heal her
surface
Restoring what can be from the festering wounds.
All who whisper her words of encouragement, and cry along
with her pain
Will join hands in knowing that our sweet lover, the earth
is in good hands, ours.
We who rise above the clatter of shallow empty distractions
Will lead the way to finding the source in all our
relations.
There is no stronger love than the mothers and the lovers.
Only love can heal the planet of love.
Grandma KoKo - Spring 2015